Where animals go on vacation to make babies

Safari Park: Where animals go on vacation to make babies

I hate zoos. It makes me cry to see such majestic animals locked in small cages while ignorant humans point and talk about where to go next. Let’s set the record straight: if you think the San Diego Safari Park is just “a zoo,” then hold onto your seat because you’re in for an 8,000-acre, giraffe-gazing, panda-greeting, lion-roaring reality check. Other zoos send animals to Safari Park to make babies. This place is one of a kind.
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Safari Park

Nestled in the hills of Escondido, about 30 miles north of downtown San Diego, the San Diego Zoo Safari Park is like someone gave a wildlife documentary a backstage pass, cranked up the volume, and added churros. This isn’t your standard animal exhibit stroll. It’s an adventure. And it’s wildly fun for adults and kids alike.

🦓 First Things First: It’s Massive

The Safari Park is BIG - like, “you may want to pack snacks and running shoes” big. Unlike its cousin, the San Diego Zoo, which is more traditional in structure, the Safari Park was built with sprawling savannahs and open-range habitats that mimic the natural environments of its residents.

So don’t expect cages and glass walls. Expect to squint into the distance and say things like, “Is that a rhino… or a rock?”

Spoiler: it’s probably a rhino.

We Can’t Stop Laughing (or Coloring)

We stumbled across these unhinged, unfiltered, definitely NSFW coloring pages—and now we can’t look away. They’re from a brand so gloriously inappropriate we can’t even print their name. Their website literally warns: “This is not a place for the weak.” If laughter is therapeutic, can we deduct this?

🚐 Hop On a Safari (Yes, a Real One)

The star of the show is the Africa Tram Safari, which takes you through herds of wildebeests, rhinos, giraffes, and even cape buffalo - all cruising through a massive landscape as if you’ve dropped into a scene from The Lion King.

You can also upgrade to premium safaris where you literally ride in the back of a truck through the fields and feed a giraffe straight from your hand. Just don’t make eye contact with the giraffe too long - it’ll win. Every time. If you find giraffe’s to be as beautiful as I do, you can watch them on the Giraffe Cam!

🦍 Meet the Locals

Here’s a short list of residents you might bump into during your day:

• Elephants who roll in the mud like it’s a spa day.

• Cheetahs that do daily sprint demos, just to remind you you’re slow.

• Lemurs who seem to be in a dance battle at all times.

• Condors with wingspans that can blot out the sun (not literally, but close).

There’s also an adorable cast of baby animals being raised behind-the-scenes in the Animal Care Center, so if your heart isn’t already mush from the giraffes, that oughta do it. Safari Park has mastered the art of the upsell. To budget appropriately, estimate how much you think it will cost, then triple it. Once you arrive, after a long flight and months of waiting, are you really not going to pay up to touch the animals? Are you really going to explain to your spouse why s/he can’t go on the safari? I doubt it. From my experience, every upgrade has been worth the price. Tip: the best upgrades must be reserved in advanced because there is very high demand and very few seats available. As soon as you book your hotel, check out the upgrade list and pick something.

🌍 Conservation is Kind of a Big Deal Here

Fun and fluff aside, the Safari Park is deeply involved in wildlife conservation, especially for endangered species. From the northern white rhino project (spoiler alert: there’s only two left on Earth) to their groundbreaking breeding and reintroduction programs, this place is not just for oohs and aahs - it’s about making a difference.

And yes, you can adopt an animal (symbolically, no lions in your apartment) to help support the cause. You can also watch the animals from home for free on several live camera feeds:

• Ape

• Baboon

• Burrowing Owls

• Condor

• Elephant

• Giant Panda

• Giraffe

• Hippo

• Koala

• Penguin

• Platypus

• Polar Bear

• Red Panda

• Tiger

🪂 Bonus Round: You Can Fly Over It

If you’ve ever wanted to soar over rhinos like a majestic, slightly terrified eagle, book the Skyfari. It’s an aerial tram. Over animals. Need we say more?

This replaces the zipline which was previously offered but…the animals got spooked…people can fly? So now those of us too terrified to zipline can enjoy the view without worrying about what we ate for lunch.

🎟️ Final Thoughts: Go Wild or Go Home

Whether you’re a budding biologist, a bored local looking for something new, or a tourist with a safari-sized bucket list, San Diego Safari Park delivers on every level. It’s educational, it’s entertaining, and it somehow balances “heartwarming” with “epic” in a single, lion-scented breath.

Bring water, wear sunscreen, and wear comfortable shoes.

Because the only thing more wild than the animals is how much you’re going to love it here.

These animals are so cute. I would rather spend the day here than on Rodeo Drive, shopping for clothes that cost more than a private tour where I can snuggle the elephant.

See you next Wednesday.

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